Yes folks, it's nearly that time of year again. Time to prepare yourselves for the highlight of our racing calendar,when club members of all abilities race against each other over a fast,flat 4 mile course. This will be my first attempt to produce a competitive handicap, so that slower runners stand a chance against the "quickies". The retiring handicapper,Dave R kindly gave me instructions last year but I may use the mathematical Carr-Hill formula for more accuracy. For those new to the club, the run has an11 am start at the club, with runners setting off at timed intervals. As you know well, I encourage runners to wear fancy dress, but this will not be compulsory-but I hope you will all at least wear something "festive". Each competitor must bring a present ( value £5) for the after race presentation-everyone goes away with something(from a jar of marmite to champagne-who knows!) There will be special prizes for the overall winner & best fancy dress. I would be grateful for help with setting up before & working out the times after the race.I'll put a notice up in the club for entries & offers of help, but you can enter through this thread. Ps best race faces please!

Smithy is going very well after all his bg training.

Will help in any ,oops me knee has just gone again,way i can and will start thinking ahh me groin,of a fancy dress costume,got to beat Tims Elvis .

Oh yes I forgot, please use this thread for all those lame excuses for poor times.Persistent offenders though may be subject to a full medical(large rubber glove?)Inside information on those running well( or deliberately badly) also appreciated!! Your handicapper is generally resistant to bribery, but is shushceptable to a pint of Cheshire Cat...hic...hic

Smithy has no speed in his legs at all and will be running very carefully in advance of his winter BGR. Therefore a geneerous handicap is required. Dave has had quite a stunning year's running. Beating Ian twice, Pete once....needs to be amongst those guys methinks...

Ah yes, I remember those halcyon days immediately before and just after my BG (much like the timing now for Mark relative to his round) when I was competing with the likes of Peter and Ian. Sadly 3 long months lay-off mean recent performances in the Sandstone trail and Clwydian Hills are a reflection of my current ability. Still, I hope I'll be able to hobble through the pain barrier to take part in this timeless classic.

Doc, I think your juxtaposition of large rubber glove and inside information is most distasteful especially as I'm just about to eat lunch! Smithy needs to carry Mr Sykes on the day to hold both of them back and Tim Charmley should start way behind me...

Have to say that this year Doc you will have your work cut out to figure out times for starting. Some of the guys have got very fast. From what i can see RAF Dave likes starting slow so he can reel in 'kit lady' as they have some sort of challenge going on. It'll soon be tugging at the running vests and tripping each other over. Mark has slowed down on the roads due to his BG training and with handsome Dave it all depends on what footwear he'll be wearing. Tanker can be fast one session then have a niggle the next so cannot judge how quick he'll be and you Doc.....well it depends on what costume you would be wearing and if you have a helping hand with your dogs. These are just some of things i observe when i'm at the back of the group.............

Methinks you play down your abilities too much mre s-w; I don't think the wise old Doc will be fooled by that at all....And Dave Clarke beat Dave Ratcliffe in a 5+ mile race today so don't be setting him off too early Martin - another pint there?

After our nine mile multi terraine session this morning Martin can clearly see i'm in need of a good handicap.no one seems keen on examining my groin problem so self surgery could be the only course of action,

Mmm some interesting observations by you wise sages-I don't believe a word of it. I remember Laynie sailing past me last year( mind you I couldn't see where I was going in that Spiderman suit) & her BL form was impressive recently-my observations from the back of that particular group. Lets see how we all do at the BL next week-will you all be tucking in behind me, or zooming off( as usual)??

Forgot to mention but are we off to the Tatt Thai buffet post handicap ?

I'd be careful with that carving knife Rob-one slip & you'll be singing falsetto!

Simon & I would like to run please Martin ..... have been away for the handicap for last couple of years , so some catching up to do.. literally!! Sue E

I always get stitched up at the handicap with better runners going off WAAAY before me. You'll see at the Borders League tomorrow what bad shape I'm in as I wheeze my way round the course. In fact you probably won't see me as you will have gone home before I finish !!

I have to agree that Paul got well and truly stitched up last year. I felt really sorry for him for about 3 minutes, which was roughly the head start i got! No he's not paying me anything....

I think that when Doc has decided on the handicaps, they should be published on the website in order to give us more time to complain. Sorry, I meant to say discuss the mertits and fairness of the handicap. A pint of Cheshire Cat wasn't it Doc ? Nudge nudge.... Say no more....

Nah, come on Paul, half the fun is the 'reveal' and the automatic moaning. And then the real moaning for those of us that get bad handicaps.

I donut think even 10 pintsh of Cat wud make me reveal the timesh (hic)on this wbsite Pauull( but u never know).